Dedication To Meditation - Dean's Diary Day Four

December 22, 2017

December 5 10:34am to 11:04 - 30 minute session after a bowl of oatmeal and a tweet I sat on the side of my bed my first inhalation began with a burp. Not dressed yet feet on the floor in about a minute or two in to my meditation I had to get up to shut off a hall light that was a distraction on the right side of my peripheral vision I immediately sat down again and within a minute or two heard a plane fly over felt a bit anxious with the thought friendly I hope. After a long night at work last night feeling intense pressure over my right eye almost a little bit of a headache. Sitting on the side of my bed without any backing I found myself checking my posture to make sure I remained sitting tall. The bigger the breath inhalation the bigger the yawn this morning. I concentrated my minds eye on the pain above my right eye and as I did the tears began to flow releasing the pressure. Once the pressure subsided I could more easily open my eyes and see clearly. My thought process seem to wander between one of three things: the pain in my eye, my wish to be happy peaceful and out of harms way and the fact that I should watch my speech today making sure it's more compassionate that I shouldn't snap at others should I get the urge to do so. I soon became more conscious of my breathing from the belly at each inhalation thought to myself, may I be happy may I be peaceful may I be free from harm. I settled into a nice rhythm after lifting my hands from my legs near my knees. I felt more comfortable in a praying posture with my hands something about touching the upper portion of my hands to my lips was very comfortable. I was also leaving myself open to the cold air with my hands at my side versus up closer to my face. Once in that posture with my eyes closed I begin to feel a swinging or swaying sensation as if I were a tall building in the wind. I briefly heard a truck go by outside my window. 30 minutes seemed to pass even faster than before and tension in my head not completely gone but better than when I started. Note: After my meditation I noticed I seem to be seeing world really well today. Much like a baseball player might be "seeing the baseball really well " while on a 12 game hitting streak. Perceiving things in different ways or noticing things that have always been there but I didn't see because the mind was preoccupied or agitated. That picture on the back of my shampoo bottle that has always been there but I never stopped to notice for example.